someone

Someone is missing who shouldn't be. someone else should be here. if u see her tell her to call me cuz i miss her.

speaking of gremlins(hence the name) mine is at camp for the week. there is a picture

Crackers? part 2

well as you can see i took a picture of the crackers and then i ate some and they were actually not bad. They weren't the best ever but as far as crackers go i'll give them a "B+". Luckily i have not suffered any strange side affects of eating the stoned wheat thins.

Peter Pan

OH OH OH!!! I love this movie!! Peter Pan HUZZAH!! Come with me Wendy, there are pirates! SWORDS DAGGERS NAPOLEON!!! HUZZAH!! Ugh i haven't seen if in forever but i LOVES it

Crackers?

So i was looking in my pantry and then to my suprise and wonderment i looked up and saw some wheat thins. Everybody know wheat thins right? the thin little snack cracker squares made of wheat. But these were no ordinary wheat thins they were stoned wheat thins. I'm dead serious! I mean seriously stoned wheat thins? how can a cracker be stoned? But yes that's what the box said "stoned wheat thins". This is obviously a strange message from gremlins unfortunatly I have absolutly no idea what this strange happenstance portends. Pehaps and attack or is it merely to distract and confuse those who study gremlins. Needless to say I'll be keeping a close eye on the pantry for some time. Maybe i should eat some of the suspicious crackers...

Speilburg or whatever his name is

Alright, here's my two cents:

First off, do not pay any mind at all to the movie “Gremlins” or “Gremlins II” by Steven Speilburg (did I spell that right). Those movies contain hideous lies and propaganda that is meant entirely to throw the average, innocent human off course. Well, people like you and me are not fooled by that—because we’re not average are we? Speilburg is a Gremlin through and through. If you have not seen any of his Gremlin movies, do not bother. In fact, they are not at all pleasant or entertaining in the least. We Gremlin Hunters see a lot, but for us those movies are most…unpleasant.

Now that should be enough to get started with. It would be wise to keep a Gremlin Log or Gremlin Book so you do not loose track of who’s who. You may write this in code if you feel the need, but let me tell you: not many Gremlins are smart enough to realize you are taking notes, so keep that in mind.

A Gremlin Diagram

this is a diagram of a gremlin in his true form. Each letter represents a description of the area it is pointing to.

A-gremlins ears large and batlike this particular speciman is rather young because of the lack of bite marks and chunks of missing ear.

B-gremlin necklace holding remnants of various prey including claws, teeth etc.

C-human finger undoubtedly taken from the body of an innocent hiker to be saved for a later snack.

D-long claws beware

E-ripped pants stolen from a hiker (gremlins are too clumsy and incompetent to weave clothes of their own the best they can do is use animal skin)

F-more claws to beware of

also worthy of note are the tatoos adorning the torso and around the eyes they symbolize status and the tribe and type (mountian, river, beach) of the gremlin. The one featured here is clearly a mountian gremlin native to the Oregon Cascades. I was lucky enough to track down this one with minimal injury to myself. However the gremlin was extremly wary after it first sighted me and it became increasingly difficult to observe him for any length of time. I do believe though that the sketch i have done is extremely accurate considering the conditions it had to be finished in.

woah

oh sorry please accept my apology hmm yea I was a little insane last night oh man it was fun though

a clump of dead baby sea weed

I'm a captain of a ship you blubbery pieces of styrofoam ooohhh my rope my rope ooohhh beware Johnny Depp. flush him down the potty. it was nice being enemies with you. die run alison run oh the pain why you lets send him a letter. mmm it's ok I don't mind, I've been waiting for it to fall off yes oh yea why don't you put it in your pocket. get her, ansel watch your language. YO!! oh you oh you him oh him music jazz bracelet falls broke lost deep blue the captain always sinks with its ship

Gremlin Egg

Excerpt from my Gremlin Journal.

Spring 2005
"While exploring Florida I found the place is covered in gremlin eggs. Most gremlins are mammals but after visiting Florida we have reason to believe that some species are related to amphibians or birds. Their eggs are found under [palm trees] When you shake [the egg] you can tell if the baby inside is dead [or not]. [If dead] you will hear a swishing sound (it's guts). Mother gremlins often insert their front teeth in the eggs and eat the babies skin. It is very unlikely that a baby gremlin would ever hatch."

the missing link

while reviewing the information listed on this site i am afraid a vital fact has been overlooked which is so basic that us who study gremlins barely reflect upon it. To us it feels like explaining the color of grass and that everyone already knows it. Unfortunatly that is not the case and those who have not spent time studying gremlins do not know that a gremlin has two forms that it can manifest itself in. The first of these is it's true form the batlike appearance that a gremlin can be found in while not invading human society. The second form is the human form. An outward appearance of a human that can fool nearly anyone and since it's human form is so convincing it takes careful observation of behavior to discover if one is a gremlin. This bahavior analysis has been so exquisitly explained by my colleage Tae.

Gremlin or Not?

Every day we are forced to make important decisions, whether it be deciding if your sandwich bread is too moldy to eat or if the person you are talking to is a gremlin. Gremlins are everywhere; Your neighborhood, your school, your office, beneath your bed, even under your toenails (as proven by the Lamisil commercial) It doesn't take a genius to spot a gremlin, you just have to know what to look for. This entry is here to educate you.

Gremlins have the ability to take on a human form. This, however, does not give them human characteristics. Gremlins are unbelievably stupid. That would be sign #1: stupidity.

Sign #2: the making/producing of rude noises and unpleasant smells. Such as burping without saying excuse me and passing gas.

Once you have spotted these signs and wish to confirm your suspicions aproach the gremlin in question with extreme caution and begin interogation. Here are a few questions to start:

Do you like raw venison?
Raw venison is a gremlin's food of choice.
Gremlin Answer: "Who's that?" (being too stupid to realize raw venison is not a pop singer but uncooked deer meat or maybe they are making a poor attempt at playing dumb.) or Yes.
*Half Gremlin: What's that?
Non Gremlin: No. (Sorry, however stupid and unpleasant this person may be he/she is not a gremlin)

Do you keep a mirror in your bedroom?
Gremlins can not stand the sight of themselves and avoid mirrors at all cost.
Gremlin: No
Non-Gremlin: Yes

Do you like rotting vegetables?
When there are no deer around gremlins often resort to eatingthe rotten vegetables in your garbage can, framing the dog. Unfortunately it takes the stupidest of gremlins to not notice that you have guessed their secret by asking this question.
Stupid Gremlin: Yes
Gremlin: No
Non-Gremlin: No

These questions are not enough. An innocent stupid person (or wise alec) could easily be mistaken for a gremlin. That is why further observation is neccesary before you can be sure you have found one. Observe for the next few days before marking them as a gremlin.

Hopefully this has educated yoiu about how to spot a gremlin. Remember BOG! Over and Out.

*a person with gremlin ancestry or a human you should take pity on for their attempts at being smart.

gremlins

Seeing as the name of this blog is "Gremlins" i thought it appropriate to write a brief introduction to the gremling species. They are small ranging from 11 inches to 3 feet and they posess rather large and pointy ears very similar to a bat (see figure A) in the most extreme cases a gremlin's ears can make up roughly 50% of their height. The main coloring is any shade of green including neon on some of the tropical and suburban subspecies.

A gremlin is very dangerous to humans because of needle sharp claws on both the hands and feet. Their diet consists mainly of raw venison, orange food (for example cheetos, oranges, etc) innocent hikers and ice cream. The most prized of these four is innocent hikers a malicious gremlin will attempt any manner of trick or booby trap to ensnare the hiker. The most common booby trap and simplest to make is a pointy stick (see figure B) If one is so unlucky to come across a pointy stick on a vigorous jaunt through the mountians or along a sidewalk BEWARE you have become the stalked and are potentially prey to any of the local gremlins. If you are merly a recreational hiker then quickly press on and do not under any circumstances touch the pointy stick, only a trained professional should ever dismantle a gremlin booby trap. If i have missed anything in this quick overveiw then i hope one of my colleages will add on to where i left off. If not i have but one closing statement B.O.G (beware of gremlins)